For many years I have been haunted by an image of the man I will marry. That image came to me 13 years ago after a rather devastating break up. At the time I never really gave it any thought. Other than, "Oh, that's nice. One day we will meet." Since then I have dated other men and had crushes on several others that never went anywhere. Occasionally having little glimpses of him in my dreams. I was content with that.
Then came the day another man walked into my life. It was magical to me at the time. He had so many of the attributes I was looking for in my Beloved. I thought he was the "The One." The day I met him in person (we connected through an online service), the moment I saw him in the airport, that little voice inside me said, "He's not the one." In the moment every part of my being said no. Yet my actions said, "Damn it! I've waited 5 years since that first image of you. We are going to make him The One." 5 years after that I would learn what a painful lesson it is not to follow that intuition. My only regret with this man is not being honest in that moment. We could have spared each other the heartache to follow. He has since moved on and gotten married. Me, however, went through three more years of wondering if this ghost was just something I made up to deal with the pain of heartache.
While working through my heartache with the second major breakup I decided to send my ghost a letter. I told him it was time for me to let him go. Perhaps in this life we are not meant to be together and I was ok with that. Wishing him well I let him go. Later that night I had an experience that indicated he was still very real and willing to wait for me to heal. He knew my heart needed time, and when I was ready to call him in. That was three states ago, two and a half years ago, and many hours of wondering ago.
Somewhere along the way I realized I actually have a deep fear about marriage and commitment. The only way to move beyond this fear is to put the intention out there that I'm ready to have it challenged. Ready to move beyond it. I've had a few out loud conversations with God about this, and of course the response was rather humorous. I'm also tired of moving around this country. One day it would be nice to share with him just how many states, miles, and jobs have been logged to find him. That will be for another day.
This time I am very serious about meeting this man, and I am also very serious about moving on with my life too. Waiting for him has been heartbreaking too. So, here is my plan, until informed otherwise, he has until my birthday this year to show up. Sometime between now and August 31st he will show up. My part of the deal is to do everything humanly possible to increase the chances of it happening. The excitement of this adventure is high!! I love a good challenge and intrigue.
So, to my dearly beloved The One, you have a limited time offer to claim your golden ticket at the Creative Sprite Adventure Factory. Where a lifetime of laughter, adventure, and smiles await you!